Sunday, July 23, 2006

23-Jul-06: Ladies and Gentlemen, A Caption Competition

If there is a more inane, self-incriminating act of journalistic hubris than this one of The Independent (UK), it's difficult to think of it at the moment. (The picture at right reproduces the cover of that left-wing British newspaper as of Friday 21st July.)

Bearing in mind that:
  • Hezbollah is estimated to have had about 13,000 missiles in their arsenal when they started this war, and has a clearly demonstrated willingness to use every last one;
  • 93 such missiles landed in various parts of Israel today
  • killing two people - Habib Awad, 48, of Aabalin; and 60-year-old Shimon Glikblich - in Haifa, to bring the total number of Israelis killed by Hizbullah missiles in their living rooms or running to bomb shelters in this Hizbullah war to 37 
  • Hezbollah has no stated strategic goals other than (a) surviving - which they have said amounts to victory and (b) destroying Israel and if not now then at some point in the future.
  • About a million Israelis are living under direct missile threat from Hezbollah, many of them sleeping tonight in bomb shelters;
  • Nasrallah and his jihadist fanatics have no strategic demands...
  • and have spent six years entrenching themselves in southern Lebanon as a state within a state under the noses of the authorities in Beirut and the bosses of those authorities in Damascus;
  • And - finally - anyone having minimal familiarity with the realpolitik of this region understands that Hizbullah is a willing proxy for the Mullahs of Iran who are happy to see them throw everything they have at the Israelis, and fight and die to the last Lebanese
we think it's time for a caption competition.

Write a headline that can replace the one composed by the editors of The Independent. To get your creative juices going, a couple of suggestions:
  • Hezbollah missile war: Who gives a damn about dead Israelis?
  • That shitty little country: Who wants the problem eliminated?
  • Jihadism - Who doesn't have a clue what it is, or what to do about it?
First prize: A very fine book: "Burning Flowers, Burning Dreams - Consequences of Suicide Bombings on Civilians" (Civilian Press, 2005).

Judges' decision final. Go to it, folks. Entries close on Wednesday 26th July at noon, Jerusalem time (the first day of the month of Av).

17 comments:

explummer said...

Who would like to see Hezbollah live to fight another day?

Elder of Ziyon said...

Who doesn't understand the meaning of the word "peace"?

Anonymous said...

Nasrallah Gleeful, Sane World Mourns

Gharqad Tree said...

Who prefers Appeasement to Peace?

Steven Brown said...

As a Briton, I hate the 'Independent' 'newspaper' even more than I hate the BBC and the Guardian! Truly vile organisations all of them. I read the Times and Telegraph and watch Sky News for my mainstream news.

I think the 'newspaper's' front page has backfired a bit. Who are the three countries on the front line in the war against terror? Israel, USA and Britain. I'm PROUD that we're all in that right hand section together. :-)

My thoughts are with you brave people of Israel at this terrible time. May a TRUE peace be not too far away.

katje said...

Maybe
'Who says "Hit Us Next?"'

Gharqad Tree said...

Who thinks those Jews in Buenos Aires were asking for trouble?

Gharqad Tree said...

Who thinks this front page shows any real understanding of the Israeli-Arab conflict?

Gharqad Tree said...

Who would welcome Hezbollah as a permanent member of the UN Security Council?

Anonymous said...

Clear-thinking results published: Students from countries on the left can redo the test.

The-View-From-Ramot said...

Terror: The thinking-about-its -vs- the doing-something-about-its

Whispering_Jack said...

Me mum reckons you shouldn't say anything bad about people so I was going to stay shtumm about the good folk at The Independent. However, these buggers are such a bunch of obnoxious hypocrites that I decided to ignore the old lady and speak my mind.

Although I haven't as yet come up with anything offensive enough for these tossers, I'd like to kick off by replacing the advertisement above the offending headline as follows:-

"FREE GLOSSY POSTERS TO COLLECT"

Then inside the yellow button -

"Starting Tomorrow – Portraits of The Independent’s Editorial Staff"

Followed by:-

"THE GREAT BULLSHIT ARTISTS"

Please excuse the coarse language but I am an Aussie after all.

PS: Is Robert Fisk as ugly as Vincent Van Gogh or what?

Gharqad Tree said...

I can't stop myself... more captions

1: Who feels safer thinking what everyone else thinks?

2: Who confuses Majority with Morality?

3: Who has forgotten Ron Arad?

Occasional Reader said...

Who spits on the graves of the Jewish victims of Islamist terrorism?

(please factor in that The Independent is just plain making some of the "yea" votes up, by the way--e.g. Canada)

Sam McNair said...

I'm sorry for your loss that differs little from the loss felt by others in this generations old conflict.

The demand on one hand that the government of Lebanon take control of their country, and on the other the total destruction of the infrastructure that is clearly designed to stop them doing anything is a crime in itself.

I respect and value the life of and Israeli citizen as much as a Palestinian or Lebanese citizen. I also think that the government of Israel needs to come clean and stop its bid for regional domination and power. After that, we may see the killing of the innocents (10 times as many in Lebanon) cease.

The-View-From-Ramot said...

I was going to respond to Sam's suggestion that Israel has to "stop its bid for regional domination and power". It's so out of the ball park that it's bound to make for an interesting discussion even if we're on different pages. But then I re-read his glib "sorry for your loss that differs little from the loss felt by others" line and realized we're not even reading the same book.
- Arnold Roth

ophelia said...

to sam:
i am compelled to comment, although i must say that mr. roth pretty much took the words right out of my mouth. how can you say that mr. roth's loss "differs little from the losses felt by others in this generations old conflict"? trust me, if you suddenly lose someone that you love more than anything else on the planet, it's very different from the death of a complete stranger. don't overgeneralize malki's death--especially on her dad's blog.

"gah! flippin' idiot!"-
napoleon dynamite